Dealing with People?

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“People are not problems to solve; they’re puzzles to understand.”

We all know dealing with people can be a bit of an emotional rollercoaster. One minute you’re having a great chat, the next you’re questioning your entire existence because someone decided to be extra difficult. But here's the good news, navigating human interactions is a skill you can learn, and like any skill, it gets better with practice.

Whether it’s your boss, your sibling, your nosy neighbor, or that one friend who’s always "just being honest", learning how to deal with people can make your life a whole lot easier.

Understanding Yourself First

Yep, You Start the Puzzle! Before you can master the art of dealing with others, you need to understand your own personality. Are you more of an introvert who prefers calm and solitude? Or an extrovert who feeds off social energy? Maybe you’re somewhere in between, that magical “ambivert” middle ground.

Understanding your comfort zone helps you respond better in tricky situations. Introverts may need to recharge before engaging in heavy discussions. Extroverts, on the other hand, might need to dial it down a notch during sensitive talks.

Want to find out where you land? Try this external link.

Different People, Different Dynamics

You don’t talk to your grandma the same way you talk to your best friend. That’s because every relationship has its own rhythm and social contract.

Here are some quick tips for different groups:

• Elders: Show respect, even if you disagree. Use calm language and give them time to express themselves. Sometimes, they just want to be heard.
• Friends & Family: Honesty is golden, but kindness is the polish. Don't weaponize truth. Know when to speak and when to just listen.
• Colleagues & Bosses: Professionalism is the key. Always stay composed. Try “I understand your point, but…” instead of “You’re wrong.”

(Also, don’t ever reply-all in anger, that’s just chaos waiting to happen.)

Situations Matter

Whether it’s a heated argument or a casual misunderstanding, context matters.

“Stay calm. Like, really calm.”

Why? Because your ability to stay calm gives you power. People lose battles not because they were wrong, but because they lost control.

“Whoever is able to anger you is your master.” — Epictetus

Instead of reacting, respond. There’s a big difference. Reactions are impulsive. Responses are thoughtful.

How to Avoid Arguments

Some conflicts can be dodged entirely, just like those ads on YouTube (unless you don’t pay for Premium).

Here’s how:

• Listen actively: Most people argue because they don’t feel heard. Let them finish. Really listen.
• Pick your battles: Not everything needs a response. Some things are just better left alone.
• Use “I” statements: Like: “I feel concerned when…” instead of “You always…”
• Take space if needed: Walk away. Breathe. Come back stronger.

When an Argument Must Happen

Sometimes, you can’t avoid it. Maybe someone’s crossing a line or a critical issue needs clarity.

In that case:

• Stay respectful
• Keep your tone in check
• Don’t raise your voice, raise your point
• Avoid name-calling or blame games
• Repeat the other person’s point to show you understand it before sharing your own

And above all: Never argue just to win, argue to resolve.

Some Really Pro Tips

1. People tend to mirror the emotional energy of the person they’re talking to, a phenomenon called emotional contagion. So if you stay calm, odds are the other person will chill out too.
2. Smiling while talking (even over the phone) actually improves how others perceive your tone. Yep, your voice literally sounds happier!

When All Else Fails… Empathy Wins

Empathy isn’t about agreeing with everyone. It’s about understanding them, or at least trying to.

Put yourself in their shoes. Maybe they’re having a rough day. Maybe they just misunderstood something. A sprinkle of empathy can go a long way.

Try this simple line next time things get tense:
“I’m trying to understand where you’re coming from. Help me see it from your side.”
It’s magic.

Conclusion: It’s Not About Winning, It’s About Connecting

Dealing with people isn’t about getting your way all the time, it’s about mutual understanding and maintaining your peace.

Stay calm. Be kind. Speak with intention. And remember, even difficult people are often just misunderstood humans with bad coping mechanisms.

Got a people-dealing moment to share?

Tell us your story, we might feature it in our next article on Soooots!